Gay friendship online

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However, the men in this study are seeking new ways to open up new relationalities through using Adam4Adam. As Gabriel notes though, Adam4Adam. Later in the interview, when Gabriel was talking about the opening story of this chapter, where a man he met on Adam4Adam.


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Yea, I want someone really quick. This is easy. But I think you can also find really cool people that will inspire you and help you out and stuff like that. His engagements online, however, are more sophisticated. He is trying to find a homosexual mode of life, where he can make connections with other gay men that go beyond the sexual components and that inspire each other to become better human beings.

Seeing Adam4Adam. Lastly, Hugo also fell in line with Gabriel in his expression of how Adam4Adam. For Hugo, as illustrated, the pleasure on Adam4Adam. The way he uses the site is to meet people for non-sexual intentions. Cruising, which is often seen as anonymous, ephemeral sex, has changed for certain gay men. Gay men can now use online cruising as a way to become gay — to express a homosexual mode of life.

In Unlimited Intimacy, Tim Dean postulated that online cruising would diminish sexual encounters and experiences with strangers. However, as the above narratives show, some gay men are looking for contact — for connection — with the strangers that they meet on Adam4Adam. My informants use their identity of gay men to become gay — to find other men to have relations with. Sexual encounters like cruising, for Foucault , did not pose the same threat to the social order as building friendships do.

My informants may in fact have the potentiality to shake up the social order. Conclusion This digital era has brought new life experiments for gay men to creatively explore in order to build relations with other gay individuals. The gay men in this study have integrated Adam4Adam. Cruising for sex has historically allowed gay men to find similar others and to explore their sexual desires Lynch ; Reece and Dodge Now, these two realms - cruising and friendship - have merged together where gay men can cruise online for friendship and other meaningful connections.

The relational possibilities of the merging of these two arenas are yet to be seen, but clearly, gay men are using their identity and this online cruising space for forging different alliances in the 21st century.


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One challenge these gay men face is the heteronormative discourse that separates sex from friendship. Through utilizing this discourse, the gay men in this study could normalize their everyday practices of finding friendships and other connections within a sexual space, challenging the larger heteronormative social order. These friendships that can be forged through online cruising should be recognized as a homosexual mode of a life — a space where men can become gay Foucault In having to Taylorize their intimate lives, gay men can integrate connecting with other gay men through Adam4Adam.

Likewise, Adam4Adam. However, this expansion of the potential pool of people to meet is still limited online, especially if informants use Adam4Adam. How do filter systems limit the relational possibilities and the forging of alliances for gay men? How does the structure of Adam4Adam. And how is this website a microcosm of larger racial and gender structures of society?

It is to these questions of exploring the limitations of meeting a diverse set of men on Adam4Adam. Chapter 2 Endnotes 1 As explored in more detail in Chapter 2, of the profiles analyzed in this study, white and Latino men were almost twice as likely to use a face picture as their main profile picture compared to black men. Black men typically used body pictures as their main profile pictures on the website.

Body type is usually athletic or muscular. Later, when Koby and I were discussing how people could select to see these individual preferences on Adam4Adam. You can put in the parameters of what you want, and then, there you go. With the advent of access to the Internet, many scholars believed online spaces would allow for a utopian democratic world without any social inequalities see Chow- White Individuals online could be free from the constraints of the social structures of difference, where social categories like race and gender would be equalized or irrelevant.

However, the Internet is a product of power and culture, and therefore, social identities are evident within cyberspace Nakamura , Race and other social categories become employed online through both texts and images, commodifying identities for consumption and divorcing them from politics and oppression. In this chapter, I set out to uncover some of the forms of inequalities that exist on Adam4Adam. Here, I focus on race and the body — as these two characteristics were the most salient in the interviews with my informants. Nonetheless, how is the structure of Adam4Adam.

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And what forms do racism and body discrimination take on in cyberspace? First, by analyzing the structure of Adam4Adam. In this study then, I empirically show how this website essentializes and collapses race into a simple drop-down menu category. In her book Black Sexual Politics, Patricia Hill Collins defines the new racism as historical ideologies about black sexualities being re-invented into new ideological forms in order to justify discrimination and social exclusion of people of color.

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This new racism is transnational, based upon patterns of corporate organization that created a global economy, and it disseminated through mass media Collins Here, I will show how the Internet, as a form of mass media that is also globalized , creates a space to further manipulate ideas around people of color. Lastly, I turn to gay bodies in cyberspace.

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Ultimately, through utilizing a critical queer of color analysis Ferguson , I will highlight how the social exclusionary practices toward people of color and non-normative bodies on Adam4Adam. In this sense, these discriminatory practices may allow certain gay men to mitigate their subordinate position in society; however, they are giving into structures that further subjugate sexually marginalized people in the end. I would look for white, Latino, or Middle Eastern men. Oh, I wanted somebody who was nearby but not next-door; so I would set my search to the region that I was in.

In this section, I will first examine the structure of Adam4Adam. Revealing the structure of this website gives insight into how gay men are conceptualizing desirability in this digital era. When a user makes his profile on Adam4Adam. Salient characteristics such as ethnicity1, body size, age, height, and weight are required to be filled out from a drop-down menu, tacitly telling users that these demographics matter the most within this space if one wants to present their desirable self.

Through turning on this feature, users can select to see only men within a certain age range and of a particular race or races, along with location and having a picture. Height, weight, and body type are important as a user must disclose them to have a profile, but clearly, age and race are constructed as the two most important factors of desirability as these are the only two demographics that the space allows for one to filter2. Race, along with age, becomes a social category and a filter that a user has access to by choosing from a simple drop-down menu.

Race is further utilized through selecting only to see a certain race or races and people of a certain age on the website. The complexities of race and age are erased through these filtering processes, as this search function just reduces these categories to a simple term that one can just click away.

So you should be at least open to the possibility of that happening.

However, he feels that people should be open to the possibility of finding certain people within a race as desirable, even if people do not find that race, in general, to be attractive. People can choose to only search for white bodies within dating and hookup cyberspaces, never having to view a non-white body online Robinson These spaces shape and regulate the intimate and sexual subjectivities of the users who inhabit these online spaces Raj However, with this new cybernetic racial exclusion, Robinson ponders how whiteness can be left as the stable norm.

For Holland , race has no meaning outside of racist practices, as today, race was and is given its meaning through discriminatory, differentiating, and often violent acts e. Therefore, the structure of Adam4Adam. In their content analysis of over profiles of men seeking men on the website Manhunt.

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Race and age must be made readily available for users to know since race and age are assigned meaning through these quotidian practices of managing intimate spaces and lives. Race and age are named in order for erotic play to be organized according to the larger hegemonic structures of society. These neoliberal discourses rely upon these economic beliefs to further liberalism discourses that everyone is equal under the law, making discrimination like racism appear to not exist Holland However, since racism makes race as a category actually have meaning, racism is not removed from these intimate practices Fung ; Holland In this section, I explore how race becomes constructed as a personal preference for the gay men in this study.

This everyday racism is disseminated through the mass media of the Internet, and it marks a form of new racism see Collins I also turn to the literature on homophily — on how and why people often build relationships with similar others Lazarsfeld and Merton ; McPherson, Smith-Lovin, and Cook - to show how the desire for white gay men gets normalized as the superior racial preference for both people of color and white individuals within this space.

Through illuminating how the structure of Adam4Adam.

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Koby held a similar view, when he told me: However, I have been attracted to like half-black and then all the other races are fine. Both Acar and Koby found Asian and black men to be undesirable. As previous research has shown, black and Asian men typically are abjected to the lowest realms of erotic racial preferences - black individuals for being seen as hypersexual and Asian men for being seen as asexual Wilson et al.

When race is marked, racism is present Holland In fact, race is marked very specifically. However, if one can mix blackness with another race, then these individuals can gain some erotic capital to become more desirable. Black bodies are not seen as being heterogenous; they are all lumped into being non-desirable. Under racialized heteronormative discourses, black people are always sexually homogenized as being undesirable, where the heterogeneity of black people is erased Ferguson Here, where the relationship is not predicated on sex, space is opened up for black men to be seen as individual subjects with their own personalities.

Through this commodification, sexual racism like race-specific sexual objectification and race-based sexual stereotyping occurs. One may not be attracted to particular people of color because they are constructed through the lens of race-based sexual stereotypes. Through the everyday practice of using the search feature on this site — a search feature that is premised upon social inclusion and exclusion — users can erase and cleanse people of color through a simple click on the screen. This everyday practice of racial categorization and exclusion in online spaces is one of the ways in which the new racism operates within this digital media age.

A brief, but telling, conversation unfolded between Tanner and me when we met. His description of Adam4Adam and the people who use Adam4Adam in New York City reveals how racial stereotypes can often operate in the gay imagination of desire: You had to cross the river to often times visit the people on Adam4Adam. Manhunt [a paid subscription gay dating and hookup website] was more for the people in the city [Manhattan]. And Adam4Adam was really above th street; so like way up there or over in Brooklyn or even Queens.

So it was just Manhunt was where you went for people in Manhattan who are white and not into weird kinky things - if that makes sense. And then Adam4adam was seen as? If you want to get fisted, you went on Adam4Adam, or if you had a Latino flair or something. There are more people of color on there?

Race-based sexual stereotypes rely upon historical ideologies about bodies of color, especially around sexual roles and behaviors Robinson Through being fetishized and objectified within these spaces, black bodies are seen as being aggressive and having big penises; Asians are seen as sexually submissive and having small penises; and Latinos are seen as sensual and having uncut penises Wilson et al.

These stereotypes rely upon larger notions of black bodies being violent, Asian bodies as asexual, and Latin bodies as exotic. To avoid having to see or connect with people of color, one could pay to inhabit a website e. Nonetheless, Darryl does not like being contacted by black men, though they may only be contacting him because it is hard for black men, including Darryl himself, to make contact with non-black people on the website Robinson Although Cisco, as well as all of the other men in this study except for Tanner, are looking for friendship on Adam4Adam.

Although sexual fields are often based upon larger stratified social structures, the individual sexual sites have their own sexual schemas that erotic players must learn to play and navigate Green , In online sexual sites, the sexual field can often be defined through the content of online profiles, which give a sense of the erotic capital of the website Green Within the sexual field of Adam4Adam.